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Head For Threads - November 2008

The Hat-inator

November 26th 2008 02:07
Stephen Jones


I'm sorry to harp on about headpieces, but this one is just ridiculous.

British Milliner Stephen Jones, who has created hats for the likes of Princess Diana, Madonna, Beyonce, and even our Kylie, did the unthinkable and crossed a hat and a fascinator, resulting in a monstrous progeny that looks like he pulled the back fence out of his garden with the flowers still attached.


Yes, this creation debuted last year at John Galliano's spring/summer collection, but I feel the need to address it, albeit belatedly, to stop further repetitions of this ghastly style.

This is not a hat. And I would vigorously debate that it is not even a work of fashion-art. There is no elegant form, no clean lines to admire. As for function - is this really going to protect you from the UV's?

If anyone thinks that by wearing this hat you will be making a savvy fashion statement - after all, it was paraded with the designs of the man currently behind the Dior label - you are clearly mistaken, most likely delusional. You will be laughed out of the room. If you can get in the door in the first place.

May this be the first and only appearance of the hat-inator.


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Credit Crunch Couture

November 16th 2008 07:49


Fashionistas around the world are in turmoil. Having maxed out their credit cards for this summer’s must-haves (or winter’s must-haves, if you’re from up north), they head off to work looking fabulous only to discover that although they possess the highly desirable skill of wearing a bright-yellow balloon skirt with considerable panache, their assistance is no longer required, thanks to another blinding trend – job cuts.


They arrive home before at 10am to find the bill for the ridiculous skirt on their front doorsteps. Unable to pay this week, next week, or the week after, the poor Fashionistas soon find themselves on the streets. They now face a considerable crisis: how on earth are they going to buy next season’s designs?

In the absence of capital for couture it is time to embrace a new trend, pioneered by the occasionally-brilliant mind of Mr Ben Stiller: Derelicte.

Subscribe to this style and the grime from your time on the street becomes your greatest accessory; fraying fabric adds texture and movement; and torn and worn patches are easily repaired with this season’s new must-have: the safety pin. Punk rockers pinned them in the seventies, Liz Hurley was wrapped up in them in the nineties, and now they are poised to puncture the fashion world again.

liz hurley


Style tips are easy to find: simply head down to your local 44-gallon-drum fire, and warm your hands with the fingerless-gloved fashion mavens who coined the style with their lack of coinage. Once you’ve let down your greasy split-ends and had a few sips of cheap whisky you’ll rediscover your inner inability to care for colour, and greet the grey with glee.

Bleak is the new black.


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Hats? YES!

November 2nd 2008 23:08
Louise Macdonald



Having already expressed my abhorrence of the fascinator, it is now time to express my approval for a well chosen hat. Think of Rose de Witt Bukater's grand entrance in the film Titanic? Poised. Classy. Iconic. Memorable.

kate winslet


At Britain's Royal Ascot, arguably the most famous racing event in the world, hats are compulsory for both men and women in the royal enclosure. Say no more. If you want to be polished, sophisticated, and fit to move in royal circles, wear a hat.

If you have made the wise decision to forgo the fascinator and wear a hat to the Melbourne Cup or Oaks Day, Melbourne Milliner Louise Macdonald has a fantastic spring 08 collection ready to go:

louise macdonald


louise macdonald


louise macdonald


(all pictures courtesy of www.millinery.com.au)

Louise also has excellent credentials to back her creations. Her career as a milliner began after a series of evening classes she took while living in London, which were lead by Rose Cory, milliner to the Queen Mother.

Since then Louise has created hats for several BBC productions including Pride and Prejudice, Persuasion and The House of Elliot, and her creations have been worn by actresses such as Emma Thompson, Minnie Driver, and Helena Bonham-Carter.

To see the her latest collection for yourself, visit www.millinery.com.au


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